Hi, I am Elsabe Pepler.
I study communication because we all need to communicate all the time.
All of us who live in a modern society, know that that we “receive” hundreds, if not thousands, of messages every day. We also “send” hundreds of messages and give signs to others. It is thus important for us to talk (and think) about good communication and writing. While we have to do it, we can just as well try to do it greatly.
We go to a medical doctor as soon as we feel sick or our bodies get ill or tired.
But our “communication” and relationships often also get sick or terminally ill. Then we just ignore the symptoms and hope the bad communication pattern or relationship it will go away or magically gets better. We keep quiet, unhappy, angry, stay where we are and we do NOTHING. It is what it is, right, so just walk away?
I love the fact of communication so much that I have done a Ph.D. in the subject. I sometimes like to see myself as the Communication Doctor. I have also studied Psychology, and the best thing in the world for me is to work with communication.
I think we can all try to improve our relationships, sick messages and miscommunication. We just need skills. And remember that nobody’s communication is ever perfect. We all struggle to communicate well.
So what is good communication as compared to just so-so or even unclear communication?
The one question that will tell you immediately if your communication was successful, is: did the communicator (you) and the receiver (your colleague or partner or friend or child or client) talk about exactly the same thing? DID YOU REALLY SHARE MEANING?
If not, our communication was ineffective. Did you feel the other person was really listening to you? Did you understand 100%? No?
Most of our communication today is “channeled” through mobile phones, computers, email, social media, messaging, texting and the traditional media such as film, television, radio, newspapers and magazines. All these messages lead to overload, communication fatigue, and misunderstandings. We are unhappy and angry and frustrated because our communication fails. But great communication and writing are within your own head and hands.
Is your communication OK and healthy?
To communicate successfully, we need to try to share meaning. If a husband or partner or wife or boss says to you: I don’t understand what you want, or I don’t know what to do to make you understand me, we are in deep trouble. Of course, things like pride and fatigue and injury and arguments all interfere as well.
Good, effective communication can make our lives – and those with whom we communicate – a whole lot better and happier. Good communication is when we are “in the zone” or “sharing the vibe” or have “good flow”. It almost makes you tingle because you know that you and the other person “connect”.
Bad communication leaves us ineffective, unhappy and alone, even sick, and destroy our relationships. We always know when we a relationships is in trouble, or when an argument causes a breakup.
It’s really not so difficult to become a better communicator, or a better listener, or even a better writer. We only need to think for one moment how and what we are saying and listening.
Did we share meaning? Did you hear what I wanted you to hear? Did I even say what you heard or understood?
I really believe I can help you to communicate better – I am, after all, a communication doctor.
Communication & Writing Services
Do you do your best clear written communication?
Facilitation services for meetings, workshops, conferences (gender and culture as well as communication)
Qualitative research: design, implementation and reports [focus groups | interviews | ethnography | case studies | content analysis | Grounded Theory | conceptual analysis | design thinking]
Good communication means that we think about our messages.
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